Month: August 2019

My Thoughts on University

My Thoughts on University

Since I will be starting my senior year of classes today, I wanted to take this time to reflect on my experiences and the college experience in general. Looking back, I feel like I wasted so much time. There were nights I spent just getting 

Planning for the Best

Planning for the Best

In my last post, I talked about what I’m worried about for the coming school year. Getting all those thoughts down on paper and out of my head was very cathartic for me. But now, I want to talk about confronting those worries in a 

My Worries About the New School Year

My Worries About the New School Year

I’ve come to realize that the most destructive thing about worry is keeping it bottled inside your head. Where is can continue to swirl around. Like laundry that’s been in the washing machine too long and is beginning to sour.

It’s much better to get it out of your head and into reality by some means. Maybe that means vocalizing it and telling a friend. Or writing it down. Some way of putting it into words and removing it from abstract thought.

Because, once it’s out of your head you can better examine it. You can look at it from all angles. It’s no longer this amorphous thing that consumes you. You can begin to attack it.

So, that was a really long way to say I want to talk about what’s worrying me about the coming semester.

Health

I’m worried that all the progress I’ve made this summer will slip away. I’ve lost weight/gotten healthy before but for some reason or other I’ve always gotten fat again. I’m afraid it will happen again this year.

I’m worried I won’t be able to sustain the healthy eating habits I’ve put in place this summer. That I’ll get lazy and fall into eating junk food, telling myself I’ll get back to eating healthy but never actually doing it.

I’m worried I’ll stop going to the gym. I’ll lose momentum. I’ll get busy with classes. I’ll make up excuses and tell myself I’ll go tomorrow. Which will become the next day/week/month.

Relationships

I’m worried that I’ll get depressed and pull away from my friends. I’ll waste time stuck in my head and not spend as much time with them as I want to.

I’m worried that we will get bogged down by classes and commitments and not hang out with each other. That we won’t explore DC and do all the things that we always say we want to do.

I’m worried that I’ll get overwhelmed and stop calling my parents and siblings regularly. That I’ll begin to lose the connection that I’ve been working so hard to build up.

Classes

I’m worried that I won’t go to my professors’ office hours like I keep telling myself I will. That I’ll psych myself out and chicken out of it. That I’ll never establish any strong relationships/mentorships with my professors.

I’m worried that I’ll give in to procrastination. I’ll wait until the last minute to complete assignments and get stressed about it. I won’t give my it all, I’ll half-ass my homework and projects and I’ll end up not really learning anything or getting anything out of the courses I’m taking.

Jobs/Extracurriculars

I’m worried that I’ll overcommit myself. I want to do well in all of the positions I’m in and I’m worried about spreading myself too thin.

I’m a leader in a couple of clubs on campus and I have some ideas I’m really excited about. But, I’m worried that I won’t be able to execute them well. All my ideas will fall through. I won’t be the kind of leader I want to be. I’m also worried that I may take on too much as a leader and not leave room for other members to grow and develop leadership skills.

This Blog

Finally, I’m worried that with everything else on my plate I’ll stop blogging. I’ll give up. I’ll stop being dedicated to monthly projects. I’ll stop writing articles. I’ll stop doing fun things in my free time just because they’re interesting to me.

In short, I’m worried about a lot of things. But, I think it all boils down to this: I’m worried I’ll disappoint myself.

Anyway, thanks for letting me vent. If you can relate and you’re also worried about the upcoming year, you should leave a comment. Maybe we can all help each other by talking about it.

An Honest Conversation about the College Experience and Finding a Job after Graduation

An Honest Conversation about the College Experience and Finding a Job after Graduation

As my senior year is fast approaching, I have been thinking a lot about my overall college experience, graduation, and trying to find my first full-time job. In an effort to talk these thoughts through, I had a conversation with my recently graduated friend, Anne, 

July Book Review

July Book Review

In June, I tried to create a regular habit of reading. You may recall that that didn’t go too well. I ended up only reading one book. But, the goal of the project wasn’t just to read more in June, but to create a habit 

August Progress Goal: Math

August Progress Goal: Math

So, last fall semester I was thinking about taking some classes in computational linguistics (think the programs that make Siri and Alexa work or give you the autofill function in Gmail). The thing is you need some solid math skills for these classes. So, I decided to take Calculus II. But, I hadn’t taken Calculus I since high school. I used this as an excuse rather than a motivator. I didn’t work hard enough. I didn’t do the homework or review the concepts that I needed a refresher on.

So, I failed. I failed every quiz and test and ended up having to drop the class. I’m not proud of this. I wish I worked harder from the first day of the class knowing that I was underprepared. But, I didn’t.

I want to correct this mistake. I’m tired of feeling dumb and struggling to do basic mental math. So, this month I’m going to start reviewing Calculus I using Khan academy and also try to memorize my multiplication tables and do speed math of basic addition and subtraction.